Maybe it WAS the brownies

I arrived at Vinny's Bar last night with The Rumor ready to take the stage. I didn't buy a toy for donation so I gave my five bucks to the marine standing at attention at the door. He was a tall man in his issue dress uniform. I rather like marine dress uniforms for some reason. When I entered I was greeted by N.L. Belardes who was accompanies by Matildakay, Mike Generik from The 28s and B.U.M.S. (read his write-up of the show), and members of The Filthies, including the man-beast himself Kenny "Motor" Mount, who showed a bit of playful disdain for the fact I was wearing a Politicians shirt rather than a Filthies shirt.

I went to the bar to order a drink, and as I was waiting I chatted a bit with a young lady sitting at the bar. Her hair was the natural color blond, not the yellow bleach look but more of a "dirty" blond. Well, I guess she really was a dirty blond because she was surveying me as if she was deciding which part of me to consume first. And I mean literally consume. She had this wild, wide-eyed expression every time she smiled at me. It was the kind of maniacal smile that comic book villains get when they're lowering the hero into some slow tortuous death. But she wasn't lowering me into a vat of sharks. She was offering me a brownie. Now, I know what you're thinking, and I did ask, "What's in it? Anything green? At least tell me there's nothing white or yellow in it." She said as far as she knew it was just a regular brownie. So I tasted it, and in fact it was just a regular brownie with no side-effects what-so-ever. Trust me, I would know.

The Filthies took the stage and they rocked out, and they didn't even have to have their cock out. Soon I was warmly greeted with the arrival of The Politicians. I was very happy because for some unkown reason Hit By A Semi was not to show up for the evening. Ando, guitarist and lead singer of The Polititians, came up to me and asked if I wanted to play "The Accordion Song" with them. A couple weeks ago I had emailed them to ask for proper lyrics to some of their songs because I was trying to learn to play them. I immediately said yes, but as the band was prepairing to take the stage I realized that I could not remember all the lyrics, so I had to tell Ando that I wouldn't be able to do it this time. He thanked me for my honesty.

Apparently The Politicians brought some folks up with them, including this bear who was drinking a bit too much. He took any opportunity to lock me in his vice-like clutches during the set in celebration of the band's songs. I desperately freed myself every time because not only did I feel he would kill me in his drunken, affectionate embrace, but he was wet, sticky and smelled like a bog. I endeavored to keep my distance the rest of the night.

Scary as that was, even more frightening was when Filthies bassist Kelly came careening out of nowhere to jump off the stage and into me and the crowd man-handling me and everyone else like some sort of a punk-rock gorilla. Kelly comes off as a kind of gentle guy. But he's no small man and it's startling for someone my size to see him coming at me like a luchadore.

The band came to their last song, "The Accordion Song." Ando looked at me and said, "Come on, Rob. Last chance." I told him I still didn't remember the lyrics, to which he said, "Just play the guitar part, then." So I jumped on stage, grabbed his guitar that had to be readjusted due to the fact that I'm half Ando's size, and began to kick ass and take names.

It was a good night for me. Not everyone gets to play a song with one of their favorite bands (and The Politicians are one of my favorite bands). Thanks to Ando and The Politicians for letting me jam with them.